[TheBlueMarvel]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rmcketha86

My wife is wanting me to get rid of my collection but I'm trying to convince her otherwise.

I’m not exactly certain whether you were meaning to show off your display or solicit advice from the thread regarding the conundrum you’re currently facing. If it’s the former; nice collection! I like the fairly equal representation of Toy Biz and Hasbro Marvel Legends. Nice to see Surfer and Bill displayed so prominently; as they richly deserve, I might add! I’m also a big fan of both characters, obviously. Seems like you’re growing into a second Deltof. Which brings me to the ambiguous nature of the language used in your post. I don’t want to seem too presumptuous, but you and your wife sound like you’re going ‘through it’ a bit. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you, considering that you two are married, but the most successful unions involve a healthy amount of mutual compromise and boat-loads of two-way communication. A little give’n’take. Byrnes already mentioned presenting your (‘our’ opinion as comic/toy fans) perspective, but there’s always another side to seeing things. Along the lines of Donmeca2020’s inquiries, you may want to explore exactly why your wife is so ruffled by your collection. Is it that she fears it will grow beyond your capacity to control? This is the usual concern of our non-collecting paramours. Is she worried that you’ll spend uncontrollably? That is a REAL problem for many of us. Or is it something else? A woman I was dating years ago had a problem with my gaming hobby. It was a considerable bone of contention between us, which we often argued about when spending time together at our respective apartments. I began to curtail my time spent gaming to levels that were, in my opinion, beyond reasonable. I was particularly flummoxed by her irritation given that, while not a ‘gamer’ per-se, she did play video games. It wasn’t until I ‘actively’ listened to her that I learned why she felt threated by my gaming. Surprisingly, it wasn’t the amount of time I spent gaming. I had developed a tendency to use gaming as a way to shut her out when I wasn’t happy with the dynamic of our conversations or the condition of the relationship. It became my impregnable shell in many ways. I’m not suggesting that this is what’s going on for you two, my point is listening and communication. I used the term ‘active listening’ because it is an important skill and powerful tool in any relationship. A lot of people ‘hear,’ but don’t listen actively. There’s a difference. Since I’ve learned the value of this concept, I have actually ‘spooked’ some women (not the goal, by any means). I’ve received comments like, “you pay too close attention; I almost feel like you are probing me for flaws or weaknesses.” I laugh it off and have learned that that sort of response is mostly the result of being unaccustomed to being genuinely listened to. A little exploration of her perspective may go a long way toward reaching an effective compromise.

Sorry ‘bout the long response…I just got the sense that you might earnestly be reaching out for opinions. Good luck!