[Moose]

I am so stoked by the new Joe figures coming out for the movie that I felt there was a need to do them a proper review, just as I have done for various Action Figures throughout the years. G.I. Joe has always set itself apart from all other action figures inasmuch as it was the first “boy doll” to be made in response to this chick called Barbie. In essence, us toy collectors really need to come clean and admit that we are playing and displaying dolls for boys, regardless of the size. Now, along came the Star Wars mini-action figures in the 70’s, which (while not officially the first small scale figure) popularized the 3 ¾” scale. Then Hasbro revamped the meaning of articulation with Joe figures in the early 80’s. Swivel arm battle grip was the answer to the mere 5 standard points of articulation that Kenner offered with its Star Wars line. The Joes had arrived in a big way again by revolutionizing the way a standard action figure was designed, while upkeeping articulation. And one of its most celebrated examples? That beautiful loser named Cobra Commander.

***SPOILER WARNING***

Without giving away too much of the plotline to the current movie, let’s just say that the characters of Rex and CC are “inseparable”. You will understand why I chose both these figures for one review once you see the movie for yourself, which I strongly urge you to do. Specifically in regards to the movie, I feel the need to point out that I was really looking forward to the Transformers sequel that came out the month prior to the Joe movie, but I was far more pleased with RoC. Director Stephen Sommers flipped CC on his backside and redesigned the character attributes doing a total 360. Remember how we always wanted to know what was under the metal faceplate? Well, Sommers took that idea, flipped and dipped it, then turned it around to the question of “Why” the need for the faceplate. Again, you need to see the movie to understand my direction here.

So, without further ado, let’s get down to business and start talking action figures.

Rex:

First off, if you haven’t picked this little gem up yet, PLEASE DO SO. Not only is this one of my favorite Joe figures in a long time, but quite possibly one of my favorite 3 ¾” figures of all time. Definitely made the top 10. Reason being? Likeness, standard Joe articulation, and ACCESSORIES! Lots and Lots! I mean, certain Joes have come with more accessories than others over the years (here’s looking at you, original Zartan), but Rex is one of the few movie line figures that differs in respect to not having a standard shoulder mounted rocket launcher. Instead, he has this contraption that I call “Starscream’s hand” because it looks exactly like the redesigned hand from the Michael Bay era. Not only this, but it has a pincher attribute where you push in the rear neon green lever, and the 4 claws extend outward to grip that troublesome Joe who just won’t take the nanites the fine Doctor Lewis has prepared. Rex also comes with a WORKING briefcase that holds 3 individual nanite cylinders and actually closes back up! (where were you with this development, 25th Anniversary Destro?) For pistols, he comes with a large uzi type rifle, and a standard hand pistol, and lastly, these really cool looking snap on mechanical hands. So what’s the problem with this stuff? Most of it won’t even stay on him! The Starscream hand is way too heavy for his body (even on the stand), the mech hands just won’t stay on due to widening during shipping as one of them arrives on his right hand in the package. I have to do some serious manipulation to get the gloves to stay on. I was really saddened that Rex couldn’t hold 1/3 of his accessories, and they basically just have to stay on the sideline.

For the figure itself, it’s likeness to the movie character is unreal. He even comes with a removable hair piece, which is cool, but it does not stay on his head well and is better left on the sidelines to avoid piece loss. Unfortunately, the mouth breather is stationary, which is a bit of a bummer since the mask on CC is not removable at all. The Black Leather coat is removable, but with a lot of strain. When you boil Rex down to his basic figure with all accessories unattached, he is pure black with one silver breather tube on his facial apparatus. Overall, I love this figure due to his large arsenal and character likeness, but he loses points for not being able to use his arsenal without a little help from me while playing, UM, displaying the figure.
Cobra Commander:

As I said before in my short “ode to CC,” I was completely taken aback by this new visage of our beloved Commander. Initially, it was a sort of disgust that could not be ignored, much like driving slowly by a car accident and looking to see what happened. However, after the disgust, betrayal, and sadness left, I was cleared to actually begin a love/hate relationship with CC’s new incarnation. Over time, it has turned to more love than hate. Gone is the military visage that dominated his appearance in all previous versions (including his “old Snake” appearance on the Transformers). He is now a solid combination of biotechnology and damaged human. And quite frankly, I love the new mask because you can actually see WHY he needs a mask now. Unfortunately, for this particular figure, the mask is non-removable (however, for an even better look, pick up the 12” version, which does come with a removable mask). There also seems to be a few variations on CC- front chest holes, no holes, tubes attached, etc. My version is the one with holes in the chest but no tubes. Differing from Rex, his overcoat is black on the outside, but “original 80’s blue) on the inside, and he comes with a few different accessories: an actual cobra snake (a possible slap to 80’s Serpentor?), which ties directly to Rex (see the movie!!!) a data pad, nanite nodule/injector, shoulder mounted rocket launcher, and last but not least, a slightly modified version of his original gun! YES! Without a doubt, one of my favorite weapons of all time. IMO, the only other handgun that matches the original CC blaster was the hand rifle that came with the original 1977 Kenner Stormtrooper (and a slew of other Star Wars figures). Too bad, though, that the gun doesn’t attach to his back like it used to. Perhaps a holster on the overcoat might have best served the answer of storage? Design-wise, you need to check out his back plate under the overcoat- he’s got this cool metallic vertebrae that really makes you wonder just how human he is.

CC does have a few drawbacks as well as Rex- namely, the same “accessories are too big for the figure” disease. CC has a hard time holding the shoulder mounted rocket launcher without toppling over, even when using his dog tag base. Also, two of his accessories (the data pad and nanite injector) have what look like attachment pegs, but I’ll be damned if I can figure out where they attach to on the figure. Another curiosity for both Rex and CC is that they have these holes in their backs which are very reminiscent of the original Joes so you could attach backpacks. Unfortunately, I cannot find anything that would actually fit the holes.

Despite the few flaws, I would highly recommend picking these two guys up- just for the sheer fact that they have many points of articulation without losing character likeness, they both reek of uber bad dictator coolness. Besides, it’s not like Destro has the cajonies to lead Cobra. Heh.

[Optimus Scourge]

great reviews, thanks!

[trebleshot]

Never having seen the Rex toy in stores, I'm loving this gallery. He certainly looks awesome.

[luketheduke04]

great review, rex looks great the data pad pegs onto the legs on my cc there are holes in the side of the leg thanks again for the review.